Lost Before You (Heart's Compass Book 2) Read online

  Brea’s eyes widen as she looks at me before a grin takes over her face.

  “I’m going to go get my purse,” she mutters as she spins on her heel, heading toward her bedroom. My eyes track her movements until she’s no longer in sight.

  “Glad to see you are finally getting your shit together, Mase. I’m going to say this but I’m sure you already know,” she winks, “but, then again it wouldn’t be the first time you missed something spelled out so easily for you. I’m only going to say this once, so listen up. If you break her heart, I’ll break your face.”

  Lissa approaches, her eyes glaring as she pats me twice on my shoulder before walking past, bumping her shoulder into my mine in the process.

  Brea rounds the corner, a smothered grin once again on her face. I know she heard Lissa and she’s finding it as amusing as I am. Lissa is fiercely loyal to the people who are close to her. She will do anything for them and whatever it takes to protect them.

  Holding my arm out for Brea, we turn to leave.

  “I won’t wait up for you,” Lissa jokes, and I can’t help but return a grin of my own.

  “That’s probably a good idea.” I wink before sliding my arm across Brea’s shoulders.

  Walking to the car, I wrap my hand around Brea’s and kiss the back of her hand. Her eyes are bright, and I can’t help but feel my chest warm knowing I’ve put that look there.

  Opening the door for her, she climbs into the passenger seat of my SUV. The drive across town passes quickly. We make small talk on the way, mostly about school and work.

  “So, what’s the plan for the night?” she asks.

  I feel her eyes as they roam the side of my face. Taking my eyes off the road, I turn and give her a smile.

  “What is your favorite part about living in Chicago?” I grin.

  “Well, it’s definitely not the Bulls,” she jokes, slapping her hand on her thigh as she laughs, clearly finding herself funny. I don’t even bother looking at her as I shake my head and fight off a laugh, not wanting to encourage her any further.

  “Don’t give me the side eye. You should’ve known you walked right into that one.”

  “Just answer the question,” I say, flipping the turn signal as I pull up to a stop light. The traffic is heavy, which is to be expected downtown. Looking over at her, I wait for her answer, hoping I was right in planning our evening.

  “I love just walking around and taking in the scenery. The city always boasts something new to explore,” she says, pausing. Turning her head, her eyes meet mine and she grins. “Oh, and the pizza!”

  Flashing her a broad smile in return, I turn my attention back to driving before someone ends up honking at me. “You got it!”

  “Aww, Mase! You shouldn’t have.” She smiles, leaning her head against my shoulder. “You know me better than anyone, you know that?”

  “Damn right, I do!”

  We pull into the pizza place. It’s a small hole in the wall really, but they are well known for their signature Chicago style deep dish pizza. Brea slides from her seat before I’m able to open the door for her. Meeting her on her side, I grab her hand and pull her in closer, ushering her inside. She bounces on her feet, excitedly, before looking up to land a small kiss on my cheek.

  The restaurant isn’t busy, thankfully. We step up to the counter and order our pizza while we wait for a table. A few minutes later, a young kid, who looks like he’s probably no older than sixteen, lets us know our table is ready.

  He seats us near the corner of the restaurant. Sliding into the booth, the server takes our drink order and leaves us alone.

  Sitting in front of Brea, I find myself taking in every feature on her face. It’s as if I’m memorizing what she looks like, cataloging her smile and the way her green eyes light up. The soft lines of her dimples to the hoop in her nose and how her long eyelashes look like feathers every time she blinks. She is so beautiful.

  “What?” Her brows furrow in concern, shaking me from my thoughts as she runs her hand through her long chocolate brown hair.

  “How are you feeling about the move?” I ask, changing the subject. By the look on her face, she picks up on my less than subtle attempt to move the conversation away from what is really on my mind.

  Letting out a sigh, her eyes look around the dining room before falling on mine. I immediately regret the direction this has taken. I watch as she runs the tip of her finger along her bottom lip, as if she’s now the one lost in thought.

  “I’m not excited about it, if that’s what you want to know. It’s for the best though.” She does her best to reassure me. “My mom called me earlier this week and told me she has been thinking about putting the house on the market. Which is weird. I know it’s what she needs though, ya know? I think it’s her way of coming to terms with the fact it’s time for her to move on.”

  “Maybe it’s the step she needs to take to fully close that chapter of her life.”

  She nods her head. “She seems good, better actually. I’m not sure what the change is, but she almost sounds happy.”

  A puff of air leaves her mouth as her eyes turn toward the window. I feel her tension ease a little as she admits it out loud, as if hearing the words help her come to terms with things.

  “That’s good. I’m sure she is glad to have you coming home to stay with her. I’m kind of jealous, actually.”

  A warm smile spreads across her face. “You know we’ll still keep in touch while I’m gone. We can FaceTime and you’ll keep me updated on how things are going at Velvet.”

  I watch as she runs her hand through her hair once again. The long strands look like silk resting against her chest. I want to reach out my hand and run my fingers through them.

  “Have you talked to your dad? Does he know you’re returning home for the summer?”

  A look of guilt passes over her face as her eyes focus on something behind me before finding mine once again. I know she is still angry with him for how he treated her mother and the secrets he kept from them both. It doesn’t change the fact I know she wishes she could still talk to him. Trust is big with Brea though, and it will take time before he earns it again.

  “No, I haven’t talked to him since spring break actually. What’s there to say, you know?”

  “Well, there is the matter of tuition. He did commit to paying for it when your parents divorced. So, what, he’s just going to stiff you on it because you decided not to show up for Christmas last year?”

  I hear my frustration seep into my tone. Just knowing, if he wasn’t such an ass, she wouldn’t be leaving me for the summer. I watch as her fingers massage the skin of her forehead. Now I feel terrible for the direction our conversation has gone. This is not how I want our last night together, just the two of us before she moves, to end up like.

  “I’m sorry, let’s not talk about it tonight. Okay?” I ask, sliding my hand across the table and wrapping it around hers. She flashes me a sad smile before muttering a quiet “thank you.”

  The waiter approaches our table with our food. I move as he sets the deep-dish pepperoni pizza between us. Brea’s eyes sparkle as if she just saw a newborn puppy.

  After serving our first slice and asking if we need anything else, he hurries away leaving Brea and I alone again.

  Raising up her pizza to me, she holds it between the two of us. I can’t help but grin at her, as I tilt my pizza to her in “cheers.”

  “In pizza we crust.” She laughs before taking a big bite. The cheese is so thick it makes it hard for her to bite through as strands of cheese hang from her mouth. Using her hand, she covers her mouth as she slowly chews, bringing in the wayward cheese as she eats.

  I watch as her eyelids flutter closed as she lets out a deep hum, thoroughly enjoying the bite, and I’m struck frozen in place watching her. I move to adjust myself in my jeans to avoid pulling her out of her s
eat and dragging her back to the car.

  Who would’ve thought watching her eat pizza could be so arousing? Never mind, who am I fucking kidding? Watching Brea do anything is enough to get my blood flowing, and I know if I don’t look away, I’m running the risk of sporting a fucking boner right here in this restaurant.

  As soon as her eyes open and meet mine, I don’t even work to cover up the look of desire on my face. By the rosy color that fills her cheeks and the rise and fall of her chest, it’s obvious she’s just ask affected by my reaction to her as I am. Her tongue darts out, licking the trace of pizza sauce from her lip, and I don’t bother to hide my grunt as I think about her tongue licking other areas.

  I rapidly divert my gaze away from hers, letting out a cough to clear my throat. I hope no one else witnessed the little show she just gave me. Brea’s a fucking knockout, and she always men turning their heads. If they were to see the look on her face and the sounds coming from her mouth, I wouldn’t hesitate in telling them to take a fucking hike.

  “How are things going with your dad?” she asks. I’m grateful for the change in conversation.

  “He’s doing good. Really good. He called me yesterday. I guess they’ll be releasing him from rehab tomorrow sometime.”

  “Mason, that’s great! Has he decided what he’s going to do?”

  “Yeah, he’s actually considering moving home. Well, closer to home anyway. When I was younger, he relocated to Florida to work for the law firm there. In one of the letters he sent, he mentioned how he was thinking about moving to Des Moines. It’s about an hour or so away from where we lived in Arbor Creek.”

  It was hard only having limited communication with my father, but he regularly sent letters about his time in rehab. Although I couldn’t hear his voice until recently, I could see the change in the limited interactions we had.

  I’m relieved he is considering making the move. I know being closer to home and our family will be good for him. Although he and my brother, Callum, haven’t talked going on two years now, I know being closer to my grandmother will help.

  I still feel somewhat to blame for what happened on New Year’s. He won’t admit it because I know he doesn’t want me to put that on myself, but after spending the holidays alone he went on a long drinking binge. He told me in one of his letters how much he regrets the decisions he made that led him to living on his own in Florida. It’s one of the reasons why I’ve always found it in me to stand by his side, despite his issues with Callum.

  “I know he’ll be happier just being closer to you,” she says, reaching her hand out and rubbing it along my forearm.

  “I am, too,” I confess, looking at my pizza as I take another bite.

  After we finish eating, we sit here for a little bit longer. I’m grateful it’s quiet here, allowing the waiter to give us some space.

  We talk about the job Brea has lined up for the summer and her plans to spend time with some of her high school friends. As much as it kills me to know I’ll be away from her for three months, it makes me happy as she talks about the people she’ll be spending her time with.

  “Where are we going now?” She smiles as she stands up from the booth. I ease my arm around her lower back, bringing her closer to me.

  “You’ll have to wait and find out,” I say as we walk through the restaurant and out the door.

  I hold the door open to let another couple in, as Brea stands off to the side next to me. As we turn and head toward the parking lot, I spot a familiar face approaching me. I know Veronica from my psychology class, but we also have hung out a few times at a couple of parties we’ve been to. She’s a pretty girl. Her blonde hair and big gray eyes were the first thing I noticed when we first met.

  I force a smile on my face, hoping she’ll take a hint when she sees my arm around Brea.

  “Mason, hey!” With a radiant smile on her face, she approaches me and I feel the frustrated growl vibrate deep in my chest as her arms envelop my waist. My body tenses, immediately turning cold as Brea releases my hand and takes a step away from us.

  My head swings her way, hoping to convey a look that says I’m sorry. Her eyes are looking everywhere but at me, and immediately I feel like an asshole.

  Damn it.

  Letting go of Mason’s hand, I take a step away and wrap my arms around my waist. As soon as I do, it’s like my body instantly feels cold, and I do my best to look anywhere but at the beautiful blonde pressed against him.

  I hear him mutter out a small ‘hey’ as he takes a step away moving closer to me. I can feel his eyes boring into the side of my face, but I can’t bring myself to look at them. The familiar way she approached him leaves me with a sense of uneasiness, and I know without a doubt they have a history together.

  A history involving him, her, and no clothes.

  The thought of sharing Mason with someone else now, after I know what it’s like to have his hands on my body, has my heart beating wildly in my chest. I can feel the emotions racing through me, bubbling up along the surface.

  I blink past the tears that are forming as Mason slides his arm around me. In the mix of my racing thoughts, I’ve closed out their conversation. My body fights off the tension as he presses me against his side, and his touch alone has all my fears melting away.

  “I’m actually on a date with my girl here,” Mason says, running his arm along my forearm up to my shoulder, pulling me closer to him. I must’ve missed the question, but if I had to guess she was probably asking what he’s doing tonight. More like, she wants to know if there’s a chance it will be her.

  I let my eyes rake over her as red-hot jealousy courses through me. Her eyes meet mine, and it’s as if for the first time she’s noticing I’m even standing next to her.

  She forces a fake smile as she holds out her hand to me in greeting. “Hey there, I’m Veronica. I’m a friend of Mason’s.”

  The way she says “friend” has me smothering a laugh. As petty and childish as it may be, I want to correct her. She may know Mason, as in familiar with what he looks like beneath his clothes, but that doesn’t mean they’re friends.

  I want to tell her while she may think they are friends, I know who he really is on the inside. That’s the part of him that truly matters. I remind myself it’s me he cares about and, as hard as it may be to admit it right now because I’m upset, I know he would never want me to be hurt by their interaction tonight.

  That thought has me tamping down my anger and wrapping my arm around him. His eyes seek mine, as if trying to gauge my reaction, although feeling the tension still rising in my shoulders. I flash him a small smile, just needing him to know that above all else, I trust him.

  “I’ve got big plans for this one tonight, so we’ll see you later,” Mason voices, raising his hand and waving as he moves us to turn. As soon as we’re a few steps away, he turns his head, bringing his mouth to the side of my face.

  He takes a deep breath with his lips pressed against my ear and whispers, “I’m sorry.”

  Hearing the worry and concern in his voice, I don’t even second guess it as I mutter out a quiet, “I know.”

  Once we approach his car, he grabs my hand to stop me before opening the door, turning me until I’m facing him. Pulling me closer, he leaves no space between us.

  The worry and concern I heard a moment ago is written all over his face.

  “Do you know?” he asks, searching my eyes for any clues for how I’m truly feeling.

  “I know you understand how important trust is to me and would never do anything to hurt me.”

  He leans in closer, pushing me against the side of the SUV. With his palm pressed against the side of my face, he brushes away my hair as he tilts his head in closer to my mouth.

  “Tell me you know how much you mean to me,” he breathes. His words feather along my lips. “I need to hear you say you feel this between us.”


  “I know,” I choke out. “I know because I feel it, too.”

  As soon as the words are spoken, his mouth crashes down on mine. He presses his body into me, and I feel his heartbeat through the palm of my hand. The steady rhythm is matching the heavy beat of my mine, so in tune with one another.

  He traces his tongue along the edge of my mouth and I open for him. As soon as our tongues connect, I feel the strangled groan vibrate through his chest. All I can do is fold my arms around his neck, pulling him in closer and hanging on for the ride. When our lips separate, I squeeze my eyes shut as he kisses a line along my jaw, toward my ear, as I struggle to inhale a breath and calm my racing heart.

  “When you’re gone, I want you to think about this moment. I want you to remember how it feels to have your lips on mine,” he mutters, pressing himself closer to me. His hard length is pressed against my stomach, causing my body to quiver. “I want you to remember how just having the taste of your lips on mine makes my body ache to be inside you again,” he says, leaning in, pressing a soft kiss to my lips, and I can hear myself sigh as he does.

  “God-damn, all the little sounds you make as you come alive for me. They are forever burned in my memory. When you’re gone and I’m alone at night, longing to have you near me, those will be the noises I think about when I’m missing you.”

  Before I have a chance to say anything, he takes a step away, pulling me with him. He turns me so I’m facing the car.

  With his body pressed close to mine, I can feel his cock against my ass. I can’t stop myself from leaning against him as his hands grab my hips, helping guide my movements.

  “Fuck, I’m going to miss this when you’re gone,” he groans in my ear as his tongue darts out and flicks my earlobe.

  Tilting my head back against his shoulder, his hand skates up the front of my shirt, cupping my breast in his palm.

  “Mason,” I whimper as I turn my head seeking his lips.

  Trailing kisses along my cheek toward my ear, he whispers, “Get in,” before grabbing the handle of the door. It takes a second before I realize he’s opening the back passenger door. I do as he says, climbing inside.